Example for Grade 4: Narrative – Ant Colony - ID: 704

for this response.

Ant Colony

  • Purpose: Narrative
  • Grade: 4
  • ID No. 704

Student Response

Scoring & Annotations

I woke up next to a tree. When I looked up the tree was gigantic and the grass was like bambo sticks in rows of millions. I started to wounder around until I heard foot steps. It sounded like six or seven people walking in a big group altogether. When the sound got closer I started to see who else was here. It was an ant, although it was very big? So I followed it on its back and it took me to an ant colony.

I was still on the ant and I to be honest, I was getting a little board so I jumped off the back of my new friend and started to walk away. Then I relised, I was lost in the ant colony! I started to panict and ran to a room filled with eggs but not the ones you boil or scramble the ones that hatch into little ants! I started run again but this time in a room filled with fungest. I stayed in that room for a while because not that many ants came in.

After a while I left and started to run until I either find a way out or until I find another room in the ant colony. Well I found another room but this one has a gigantic ant in it! Lukily it was harmless and this one was laying eggs. Then it hit me. The first room I was in had eggs and the secound one had fungest. It had all made scence to me now.

When the queen ant layed eggs the other ants take the eggs to the room I was in at the beggining and the ant I was on when I entered the colony must have been looking for food instead of me and onse the food gets in the room I was in with fungust they put that fungust on the food! Now I have to figure out the way out. I started to run but I ran into a soldier ant but the good thing is he brought me out of the colony.