Example for Grade 3: Narrative – Astronauts - ID: 647

for this response.


  • Purpose: Narrative
  • Grade: 3
  • ID No. 647

Student Response

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My name is doug and i’m a astronaut. I live with my dog Joe. In space, I’m the best man. II go on the hardest missions. On those ones I bring my dog. I usually find ways to sneak him on board. Speaking of ships, I have one 0f my own called the B.F.F. The name is totally cawinsudentel. It’s short for  BEST of the FAST and FURIOUS. I recently attended one of those big missions I was talking about, and here’s what happened.

I was playing teeny titans go figure on my phone, when it turned off. Then suddenly all the power in my house turned off! Joe curled up next to my and wined. Then there was a knock on the door. I opened it slowly, joe slightly growling. Then my boss ( the commander of every space launch their has ever been)came in. He came in with a lantern and a stern look on his face. “All the satellites orbiting earth shut down.” he said.”ALL of them!” I said very surprised. “ not ALL of them,” he chuckled “Just the main ones.” “I’ll meet you there.” “yes captain.” I said trying to sound tough. The blanket of anxiety pulled over me while I was packing my stuff (including Joe who was in my hat.) But I puffed up my chest And got in my ship.

I flew to the astronaut shudel. I could already feel the blood flow to his head. I had chicken legs! That’s why I have chickens! When I landed in the parking lot for  the space shuttle. When I got there I could see the chief pushing a metal table which would be heavy on earth but were not on earth were in space, things are lighter in space. Anyway, he pulled up some chairs for the other people there, including me. When we all sat down, the chief started talking.”Everyone will stay at the station while and keep tabs on douge while he fixes the satellites. Everyone looked at me for a second, then the captain continued. “We will give you a red space firework incase anything went wrong. I said farewell to everyone and went to go fix the satellites!

I was doing some exercising with the bungee cord on my ship during ato-pilot when the ship rang an alarm! I ran to the front of the ship and it said that there were asteroids! I could deal with this. I participated in world war 2, and luckily they taught me how to dodge missiles in a jet. I flew throw them and I didn’t hit 1! (Or so I thought.)  When I got throw that, I looked out and saw one of the satellites! I put on my suit and went out in space. I fixed it and went back in my ship. Then the control board told me that the wing of my ship was damaged. What could have done that? Oh how I wonder.*whispers*(It was the asteroids.)

I go to the broken part of the ship and the speakers on the ship said: 40 seconds before destruction. It would take 40 MINUTES to fix it, not 40 seconds! I open the control panel and guess what was under it? 3 wires, a green one, a red one and a blue one. I’m going to have to cut one, I think. But which one? I think, and think, and think. It’s hopeless. Then I feel a gentle paw on my shoulder. Its Joe! I hug him waiting for the end. Then Joe jumped for the control panel, 5 seconds left. His jump gets closer, 4 seconds left. He lands on the control panel, 3 seconds left. He jumps to the wires, 2 seconds left. He grabs the green wire with his gaws, 1 second left. He he rips it 0 seconds left. I close my eyes ready for my demise, nothing happens. I look up at Joe, tongue hanging from his mouth tail wagging. He had saved me, and he knows it! I went to the front (Joe following) and looked out. I was the next satellite! I went to go get my suit when something caught my eye. I looked out the window, and so did Joe. It I saw the last satellite! Joe barked to show his excitement. I opened the door and fixed both of the satellites. I looked at earth, I was on the moon side so everything was dark. Then all the lights turned on, it was beautiful. I went in my ship and hugged Joe. I turned on the power I am a hero,

 We are heros


Or is it?